Monthly Archives: October 2012

While I’m waiting

I have been very disappointed recently. Disappointed in myself, not anyone else. I had myself elevated to overcome almost every obstacle, and I hit a brick wall with my recent surgery. It wasn’t due to poor medical help, family assistance, supportive friends. My disappointment came simply because I had unrealistic expectations about my recovery.

The short version of what happened is this: I had an emergency laparoscopic surgery of my gallbladder eleven days ago. The surgeon made four simple incisions. The medical tape did not hold – at all – and I had quite a few staples in my stomach. One of the other incisions became infected. I joked that my bikini modeling days were behind me.

My surgeon said it would require a full two weeks to recover. Here is where my downfall happened. I heard two weeks and determined it would be five days. At day five, I was still sleeping most of the day. At day seven, I finally felt well enough to go for a car ride.

If I were being truthful with myself, I am making great progress.

  • Yes, the main incision really does look as bad as I think. It doesn’t extend across the entire stomach.
  • Yes, I have been slow to get out. I have made significant progress every single day.
  • Yes, I still need help. I am returning back to my normal routine.

I had unrealistic expectations because I ignored the truth.

I am often encouraged by Donald Miller, who said “When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” . I need to apply this truth to myself.

Today I woke up with a renewed attitude.

  • I will set achievable goals.
  • I will accept that I am not perfect and learn to appreciate both my strengths and weaknesses.
  • I will stop criticizing myself.

Which side do you fall on? Do you expect others to be perfect, or do you put that burden on yourself? Who needs your forgiveness today?

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